Saturday, May 14, 2011

Poor Ava's Almanac

1) Much to the chagrin of my Sweet Valley High reading sixteen year old self (i.e. the relationship between Todd and Elizabeth), your significant other is not and shouldn't be your best friend.  That role should be reserved for someone you are not sleeping with (a).

2) Complaining, a necessary emotional outlet for most women, will never be seen as an aphrodisiac by men-- this is what girlfriends are for.

3) It does not matter if your IQ is higher than Einstein's, conversations in public, over heard by others, are never deemed ground breaking by bystanders.  At best you sound like a vapid airhead-- but more so than not-- you come across as a show off douchebag (especially when talking about work).  Please refrain from speaking when in an elevator.

(a): More on this in a later post.

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